That Was Really for Sale in CVS

FYI, hair-healthy cholesterol treatment.


Not to be outdone by its next door neighbor: a placenta hot oil treatment. Uh-huh. That's right. It's yours for under 5 bucks. I'll be spending at least twice that to trying to drink away the memory of finding this while shopping for a birthday card. Oh who am I kidding, I would be drinking anyway. This just gives me a purpose.

That Was Real Mayonnaise Pasta

That's a real Guinea Pig in bed.

That Was (a) Real-ly Good Manicure

The color is not only fresh teal. The mani is just plain fresh. #OhHiNeonSpringTrend. Check your exclusive CVS for Milani neon lacquer.

That was real-ly damn unnecessary.

Found on Etsy today. The name alone made me annoyed. I hate what it means, and I hate that it rhymes. THEN, I saw it is leopard print, and I was angrily annoyed. Really? Someone needs a hose cover in the first place? And the person who needs it also needs it to be not just a solid but a print? Why?? To make a statement? To draw attentiont to a garden hose? WHY would you want to draw attention to a garden hose? Even if you're taking this seriously as a design, then you would not want to draw attention to a garden hose as a design element. Finally, I was offended when I read the listing and absorbed the sum total of it all. "Add a bit of grrrr to your garden?" Go fuck yourself. And donate what you would have spent on hose clothes to charity. If you invented this, then you have too much time on your hands. If you're buying this, then you have too much money. And, if you like this, then the world pities your horrible taste in everything that exists.

That Was Real-ly First.

I surf the web a lot. I read a lot. I watch a lot of TV and movies. Listen to a lot of music and look at a lot of art. All of provokes a lot of thought. As a courtesy to my brain, I'm offloading some of those thoughts here.